Monday, January 30, 2012

One Down

This, friends, is what we call success. I had almost forgotten what it looked like. Wes is consistently eating now. Of course, he's still nursing too. But less. Much less. I have discovered that the trick to getting him to eat is to give the food to someone else. Classic jealousy tactic. The good news is that the eater (usually Grace or Claire) always shares. 'Cause who can say no to this face? Could you?

Friday, January 27, 2012


In the past, you may recall, I've tasked myself with some nice and ambitious New Year Resolutions. After 20 years of that, I've come to the conclusion that I'm just not quite that awesome and should probably trade my perfectionistic desires for reasonableness. Which is surprisingly not as devastating as I thought it would be. Yay.

Here are my resolutions this year:
  1. To take more everyday pictures. I'm thinking a picture a day. But I'm already behind. So... let's say a picture a week.
  2. Laugh more. I know it's a horrible goal. It's totally unmeasurable. But. Oh well. They're my goals. Bwahaha. Oh, look at that. Success already.
  3. Spend some time every day in the scriptures. Some time. I'm not making any specific time requirement here either. I know, shoot me. But I am taking cues from Sister Beck in her comments here. (It's a podcast link. You should totally listen to it. It will make your life better.)
  4. Wean Weston. This might be the hardest goal ever. He doesn't like food. In fact, below I have combined goals 1 and 4 to demonstrate that I really am trying. I am making efforts with applesauce, PB&J, oranges, oatmeal, and yes, even pepporoni and hot dogs (don't hate. I'm a desperate woman).

Such a heartbroken little face. Poor miniature munchkin.

Friday, January 6, 2012

Happy Alive Day

I'm not sure how to feel today. I can't choose between elation and dread. Either way, a year ago today, my mom's heart stopped and my dad had to start it again.

When we heard about it that afternoon, after she'd been stabilized, we thought the worst was over. We thought "What a scary fluke!! What a relief Dad saved her!"

Tomorrow is the anniversary of when we realized we had celebrated too soon and it occurred to us she might never wake up.

A year ago tomorrow, Brad left work at 9:30, came home to a hysteric wife packing bags, and hustled to help and drive us all straight to the hospital in Dallas. We weren't sure we would make it in time to see her alive.

But we did. And she is. And that is... Well, that is a miracle.

It's a miracle that, at least once a day, when Claire grabs my phone and calls her, that my mom is there to respond, "Is this my little friend?"

I still always wonder what would be happening if things had worked out differently. The thought of having to remove her number from my phone is enough to bring me to tears. (yes, mom, I am sobbing to Brad just thinking about it.) And really, I am a little confused. I can't understand why I still feel so much sorrow mingled with the relief. It's been a year and I still can't even listen to the recordings of when she began to regain consciousness. It's still too fresh.

I love her. I love all she is to us. I love my dad who was there to save her and who has been there every day since.

Happy Alive Day, Mom.